I feel a little like I am looking through a tunnel at a bright and shiny entrance ahead. Do babies feel this way when they are entering the birth canal? A baby may not cry from fear or trauma or shock, but from the uncontainable joy of ultimate possibility that awaits when transitioning into the light after spending its entire existence in darkness. My passage is not one of birth, but rather renewal and regeneration. At this time I know only what has passed behind me, with a vague impression where my transition will lead. Despite the uncertainty, each step feels like a fluid progression that has been illuminating a path of tremendous creative, emotional, and spiritual growth with increasing intensity.
On December 1, I moved out of the home I have shared with my spouse of 22 years. I am moving willfully—no, eagerly—from the darkness into the light. Heart first, not head first. I am dancing through this transformation. Each step will fall wherever it takes me.